I need to get something off my chest. I really don’t care (very much) if you or the artist you represent record this song. But I feel like it deserves to live and not rot in obscurity on my vacant blog and YouTube channel, so that’s why I’m making this pitch.

Video is below….check it:

If you’re intrigued but skeptical after hearing the song, this post is for you. Here are the top 10 reasons to consider recording “Cutting the Backwoods Down.” The song is at the top of this post, the pitch is below — plus a second acoustic version that I perform myself, with a little help from a virtuoso musician from the Netherlands.

#1 Reason to Record Cuttin’ the Backwoods Down – The Title/Concept

Come on, this is objectively a much better title than “This is How We Roll” or “Up Down” or “Bottoms Up” or any other party song that’s come out lately. Concept-wise, I’d argue there hasn’t been a better party-song idea since “Friends in Low Places.”

#2 – Great Name for a Tour

Luke Combs presents, “The Cuttin’ the Backwoods Down Summer Tour, 2020.” Or if not you Luke, someone else. I know you like to record your own stuff but maybe this song is worth making an exception for. Other possibilities include Jason Aldean, FGL and Morgan Wallen.

#3 – America’s (Almost) Ready to Party Again

And this will be the perfect anthem to crank up once the coronavirus hysteria starts to wane. Godspeed to all my friends who work in healthcare and EVS, as well as all the truckers, police, firefighters, etc. who are keeping this country operational during this pandemic. This too shall pass, I believe that.

Reserve “Cuttin’ the Backwoods Down” now and release it when the timing is right, whether it’s this coming summer or next year (my guess is next Spring will be the ideal release date). Stay safe out there.

#4 – It Stands out a Little, in a Good Way

Look, I hear country music a little differently, for better or for worse. So does an artist like Luke Combs and he has been richly rewarded for bucking industry trends. He’s had quite a few songs approach radio’s unofficial 4-minute death mark, some of which have soared straight to the top of the charts. The tempo could be sped up here easily; my acoustic take (at the bottom of this post) clocks in at under 3:30.

This song wasn’t built on an assembly line and I think people will appreciate its originality, attention to detail, and craftsmanship.

#5 – It’s Funny

With few exceptions, mainstream country music isn’t funny anymore. But as Blake Shelton proved in the not-too-far-distant past with songs like “She’s Got a Way with Words,” and “Some Beach,” a splash of humor can be a welcome addition to a person’s boring morning routine/commute.

#6 – Merchandising Opportunities

I’m talking about alligator hats, boots, shirts, visors, jackets, etc. Maybe sausage too! You could have Backwoods shirts as well featuring the characters in the song, including one-eyed Tommy, etc.! Hell, you could even sell masks to prevent the spread of COVID-19 and donate the proceeds to research, etc.

#7 – Memorable Lines and Characters

Examples:

* One-eyed Tommy may wrastle a gator

* No backwoods would mean no fishin’, no huntin’, and no kissin’ your cousin

* I’m just kiddin’ Billy Bob, have some corn on the cob.

* Now there ain’t no denyin’, we’re living and we’re dyin’ (it’s an existential party song of sorts, I suppose, ha).

* They’re gonna see this party up in space

Also there’s the main character of the song, who’s like a weird, hetero, Joe Exotic-type redneck party planner.

#8 – Sick Rhyme Spittin’ in Rows

Bob Dylan and Eminem were both masters of the rhyme-overload technique, particularly during their verses. This technique is rarely employed in mainstream music today, which is a shame because it’s a highly effective mnemonic device when used properly. I drop some pretty sick — not to brag, of course — rhyme flows in both verses 1 and 2. Examples:

* Verse 1: “Get your ass up in gear/I said it’s clear/the perfect time of year/and we’re about to party like the end’s already here.”

* Verse 2: “It won’t be catered, but yo/we brought a generator/and a grill then later you know/one-eyed Tommy may wrastle a gator and so”

#9 – The Disclaimer (with a line about social distancing/wearing masks in public if needed)

How many party songs have disclaimers? None that I can think of! That’s super unique and kind of awesome in my opinion.

In light of recent events, I could tweak it a bit and add a line about social distancing or wearing masks if needed, so it’d go like this: “The following recording is for entertainment purposes only. Please party responsibly, practice safe social distancing, and don’t go wrastlin’ no gators.”

I could throw something in about covering coughs and sneezes too.

Undoubtedly, you’ll have to tread a little bit carefully here, given the severity of this pandemic, but I think it’s possible to tastefully and respectfully promote the song — again, when the timing is right. As I said, my guess is the ideal release date will be sometime next spring.

#10 – Arena Ready

Crank the guitars, this one is sure to be a classic, foot-stomping arena singalong for years to come.

#11 (Bonus) – Epic Video Potential

Maybe you invite healthcare workers who are fans of country music to a free concert and produce a music video showcasing the event.

Everyone gets a mask of course. There, you honor the heroes who fought the battle on the front lines and give them an opportunity to celebrate life in a communal setting once again. Just an idea. Or you do the whole thing digitally — a house-party song.

Below is my acoustic take on the song, featuring the only banjo pickin’ and tobacco spittin’ redneck from the Netherlands, Bart Dietvorst, with a fresh disclaimer for the pandemic and impending apocalypse: